Thorns of Decision (Dusk Gate Chronicles) Read online

  He put his finger under her chin, turning her eyes to meet his in the dim light. “We are, Quinn. You don’t have to be unsure about that part.”

  “I still don’t...”

  “I know, sweetheart. You still can’t make any promises. How did things go with your mom, anyway? What happened?”

  “Quinn? William?” Nathaniel’s voice called from the blackness. “We should head back in a minute. Everyone will be worried, and I want to know more about what’s going on.”

  At the sudden reminder of the reality of the situation, William deflated like a popped balloon, and she watched him actually grow smaller. She was right to have come here tonight.

  “We can talk about that later,” she said, taking her lantern in one hand, and his hand in the other. “We should go.”

  17. Eldon Hardridge

  In the light of the morning, Mistle Village was an even sadder sight than it had been during the night. The smoke was slowly beginning to clear, but there was still a light haze everywhere. The mood in the encampment was somber as they began making plans for a funeral for Eldon Hardridge, and started the long process of cleaning up the clinic site.

  With little to do as a healer, William decided to keep himself occupied by helping Quinn look after the youngest Hardridge children, all of whom were too little to really understand what was going on.

  He played catch with the twin boys, who were five, while the tiniest ones, George and Arianna, played in the grass near Quinn’s feet.

  Knowing that there would be enough sad days ahead for the children, they had all decided to wait as long as possible before telling the youngest ones. The older children were with their mother now.

  Though he tried to keep a smile in front of the children, his heart was heavy. He’d done everything he could yesterday for their father, and in the end it hadn’t mattered. Discouragement and anger mingled in his chest, regularly threatening to overflow.

  Nathaniel was more upset than William had expected. He’d barely been talking to anyone. Quinn had told him that Nathaniel had known Eldon Hardridge, which surprised William. He’d always imagined that since he’d traveled so much with Nathaniel that he had met most of the people Nathaniel knew. Of course, their time in Philotheum had disabused him of that notion; he should have known that there were a lot more things he didn’t know about the man he’d always called “uncle”.

  It surprised him how much better he felt, though, having Quinn back. The last ten days without her had been different in ways that he had not expected. They’d never been separated like that since they’d started courting. When she’d first decided to go back, he’d been a little sad at the idea, but had figured that it wouldn’t really matter much; he’d been here without her for most of his life.

  He had a hard time understanding how things could have changed so much for him in such a short time, how he could have gone from being completely okay with being on his own, here, in his own world with his own family, to spending ten days feeling lost without this girl.

  It was dangerous territory, he knew. Quinn couldn’t make any promises to him, and he couldn’t make any to her. Even if her father was from this world, it didn’t mean that she would stay here. Her family, her life, was all in a different world. He couldn’t ask her to give that up – could he?

  Four days ago, he had been sitting and chatting with Thomas when his brother had asked him if he would ever consider giving up his life here in Eirentheos to be with Quinn. At that moment, he’d realized just how far out of his depth he was with this girl – because he’d actually considered the idea.

  Now that she was back, sitting only a few yards away from him, the question pressed even harder against his heart. Could he give up his whole world for her? As he watched little Arianna pick wildflowers and carry them back to a smiling Quinn, he thought that maybe he could.

  When the two boys, Kevin and Blake, lost interest in the game of catch, William suggested they take turns practicing keeping a crumple goal, and he wandered back toward Quinn.

  “What are you doing?” he asked, sitting down next to her.

  She shrugged, holding up a string of small pink flowers with the stems tied together. “Arianna’s looking for these ones so I can make a necklace for her.”

  He took the chain of flowers and laid them gently across his palm. “These are ameliorosa blossoms,” he said.

  “Okay,” she shrugged again. “They’re pretty.”

  Arianna ran up to them then, carrying three more. George toddled behind her, his hands full of several different kinds of flowers, and two kinds of weeds as well. “Pwity!” he declared.

  “Yes, they are, George, thank you,” Quinn said, taking them and then watching the two children run off again.

  William watched her stare absently at the little girl, a lump coming to his throat as he realized that Arianna was about the same age as Quinn had been when she lost her own father. He reached to take her hand.

  She turned to look at him. “So, what kind of flower is it?”

  He glanced down at the blossoms she was adding to the small chain. “Ameliorosa. Also known as the healing flower,” he said, pulling his pendant out from under his shirt, and showing her the flower engraved there.

  A strange look crossed Quinn’s face for just a moment as she looked at his necklace. He saw her take a deep breath and compose herself before she answered.

  “Why are they called that?”

  He wanted to ask her what that was all about, but he had a feeling now wasn’t the right time. Last night, as they’d walked back to the campsite, he’d asked her again how the confrontation with her mom had gone, but she’d changed the subject in a way that let him know she wasn’t ready to talk about it yet. Something about her reaction now felt the same way.

  “Um,” he cleared his throat, “the flowers have many healing qualities. The petals can be crushed into a salve that’s good for rashes and injuries, and the stems and leaves can be brewed into a tea that helps with cold symptoms.”

  She still seemed distracted as she nodded and looked down at the flowers. “Is it okay to be letting her pick them?”

  He smiled. “Sure. They’re everywhere. If they weren’t such useful flowers, we’d probably call them weeds. My little sisters love to pick them, too. They’ll make huge bouquets and then leave them in piles on all of the counters and tables to wilt and crumble and make a mess.”

  That got her to smile. “Good. I just didn’t want to be making the same kind of mistake I did last time I tried picking flowers in Eirentheos.”

  His stomach made a tiny flip at that memory. “Nope. Only shadeweed is poisonous, and you know that one now. The rest of the plants and flowers are fair game.” He leaned in and kissed her on the forehead. He was relieved when he felt her relax against him. “Are you doing okay?” he asked softly, his face still close to hers.

  “Yeah, just sad for them,” she said, looking back toward the children. “And mad that someone would do something like this. What did they do to deserve that?”

  There wasn’t an answer to her question, the same one that had been plaguing him all night. Not knowing any other way to respond, he picked up her hand and pulled it into his lap, and they sat in silence, watching the children play in the sun.

  * * *

  It was late in the afternoon before Quinn ever got a chance to speak with Nathaniel privately. The king and queen had arrived shortly after breakfast, along with Max, Evelyn, Howard, Rebecca, and Linnea, and everyone had been busy most of the day.

  Although there had been several offers of help, Nathaniel insisted that he wanted to prepare Eldon’s body himself. Stephen and Charlotte were going to take care of the funeral arrangements, and have Eldon buried in the large cemetery just outside the boundaries of the capitol city. Eldon’s body would need to be moved there.

  When Nathaniel finally emerged from the tent, Quinn was the only one who saw him. She hadn’t been aware of how determinedly she’d been waiting, her senses
on alert, wanting to seize the first opportunity she had to speak with him, but as soon as he walked around the back of the tent, heading toward the edge of the campsite and the nearby woods, she let the plate she was washing slide back in to the wooden bucket, and followed him.

  William, who was a few feet away from her, digging through a large crate of medical supplies that had been recovered from the clinic, glanced up when she stood. She shook her head at him, holding up a finger in a “wait” gesture. He raised an eyebrow, but didn’t follow.

  Nathaniel didn’t turn around until they were far away from everyone, nearly to the tree line, although from the way he’d slowed, she could tell he knew she was behind him. When he finally did turn to face her, she was startled at his expression, at how devastated he was, at the unreleased tears that pooled in the corners of his eyes.

  “You knew him well,” she said quietly.

  “I did once,” he answered. “When we were very young.”

  She didn’t press him for more information, sensing that he would tell her more, once the words came. He started walking again, down into the trees, and she followed along, just behind him, down through the trees and to the edge of a stream.

  Kneeling down at the edge of the stream, Nathaniel dipped his hands in the clear water and pulled them up to wash his face. Quinn sat down on the bank a couple of feet away, watching quietly, studying her uncle’s reflection in the water.

  When he was finished washing, Nathaniel collapsed onto the ground, clearly distraught and exhausted. “I’m sorry, Quinn,” he said.

  “What would you be sorry for? You didn’t do anything.”

  “Maybe that’s the problem. I didn’t do anything.”

  “What do you mean?” she asked, frowning.

  “I mean that sometimes it’s really hard for me to know if I made the right decision – leaving my home the way I did, hiding out in your world for all of these years, supporting Samuel in his choice to hide out, too, not pushing him to come back and take what was rightfully his.”

  “You could have been killed if you’d stayed.”

  “That’s what we told ourselves, but who knows if that’s really what would have happened. It’s a lot harder to get away with murdering two princes than the innocents who are trying to protect them.”

  “Hector and Tolliver seem to have managed.”

  “And so successfully, too.”

  Quinn blinked; she’d never heard Nathaniel use a sarcastic tone before. “You know what I mean,” she said.

  “I know what you mean. But the fact is that neither Samuel or I did die at Hector’s hands. I’m alive and well, and he likely would be too, if he’d stayed here, in this world.”

  She swallowed hard – she’d never thought about that.

  “And in the meantime, Quinn … other people have died, protecting our secrets, fighting our battles.”

  “Who was Eldon Hardridge?”

  Nathaniel sighed. “Eldon’s parents were two of the earliest members of the Friends of Philip. They knew that Samuel hadn’t really died. Eldon and I were close to the same age. We were the youngest ones at those meetings…”

  A tingling sensation ran up her spine, and her eyes widened. “So was Eldon …”

  “Yes, Quinn. Eldon was there the night that I “died” in that house fire in Philotheum. His home was the safe house we all fled to.”

  Nausea tore through her stomach; she had to put her head in her hands to steady herself as questions and ideas collided in her mind. When she finally looked back up at Nathaniel, his eyes were wide, concerned.

  “I don’t suppose there’s a high chance that it’s all just coincidence, then, that the Hardridges’ home was burned down in Philotheum, or that someone was desperate enough to follow him all the way here to finish the job.” She had to choke out the words, could barely hear her own voice over the pounding of blood in her ears.

  Nathaniel inhaled sharply. “I’ve said before that it would be a mistake to underestimate you, Quinn. You are Samuel’s daughter every inch.”

  “So what do you think it means, Nathaniel?”

  “I would have to know more to be sure, but my biggest worry is that it means there are people who know about me who shouldn’t, and that anyone in the Friends of Philip who might be able to confirm my existence is in serious danger.”

  “Why? Why would it matter?”

  “Because if people have knowledge about me – or worse, knowledge that Samuel didn’t die in Philotheum, then there is a direct threat to Tolliver taking the throne. If enough people knew there was a rightful heir, then everything Tolliver is working toward would fall apart.”

  “But there is a rightful heir.” Quinn’s voice shook on each word.

  “Is there?”

  18. Baby Seeker

  “You’re up early.” The sound of William’s voice startled Quinn as she walked into the common room. It was early, she supposed. A faint glow had just begun to peek over the edge of the horizon when she’d looked out her window a few minutes before.

  “So are you,” she countered, raising an eyebrow.

  “A little late, actually. I usually make myself a mug of tea and take it outside in time for the sunrise. Not that there’s been anything usual about anything lately.”

  “That’s for sure.” Quinn had been back in Eirentheos for five days now, and life at the castle had been anything but normal. “So what’s the hold up today that you’re running so late?”

  He walked over to her and reached out to her, leaning in to kiss her cheek as he took her hands in his. “Nothing. I was just waiting for you, actually.”

  She raised her eyebrow. “Then why did you sound so surprised when I came in here?”

  “I just figured you would want to sleep in,” he said, shrugging. “You’ve been so busy lately, and this is the first day since you’ve been back that there’s not something going on ...”

  There had been something to do all day every day since she’d been back. Yesterday had been Eldon Hardridge’s funeral, and last night they’d taken Connie and the children back to the Welshes’ farm. Marcus, using connections within the Friends of Philip, had managed to locate Connie’s younger brother and his wife in Philotheum and had brought them safely over the border two days ago – they were all together now.

  Quinn had been tense ever since her conversation with Nathaniel; the weight of the decision that she faced was like a pile of bricks in her stomach. She still wasn’t ready to tell William, or anyone, about what she had learned.

  Forcing the thought out of her mind yet again, she looked over at him. “I don’t normally sleep in very late, either – when I actually sleep at all.”

  The almost-lighthearted look on his face changed to one of concern at her words. “Did you sleep last night? Have you been dreaming again?”

  She shook her head. “I did sleep last night,” she said, rubbing his hand in hers. “Surprisingly, I haven’t been dreaming at all since I got back.”

  His eyes widened; he looked as surprised as she’d felt when she first realized that. It had been a long time since she’d had more than one consecutive night without being plagued by the odd dreams.

  The kettle on the wood stove whistled just then, and William walked over and poured the boiling water into two travel mugs that were sitting on the counter. She smiled. It was always so odd to see the little objects here and there that William or Nathaniel had so obviously brought back with them from her world. It was an odd contrast to watch him pull an old-fashioned-looking tin kettle from the wood-burning stove, and pour the water from it into two stainless steel travel mugs with vacuum lids. She wasn’t sure she’d ever get used to it.

  Pale sunlight was beginning to stream through the large window at the other end of the room. “So you didn’t tell me why you were up at the crack of dawn, ready to wait for me to sleep in for hours.”

  He chuckled, carrying a steaming mug over to her while he screwed on the lid. “I have a surprise for you. Walk w
ith me?”

  “Sure.”

  Outside, the morning was beautiful. The air was just cool enough that she was comfortable in the light sweater she’d grabbed, and birds were chattering at each other in the nearby trees. The grassy lawns surrounding the castle glistened with dew, and the gravel of the path they were on crunched under their feet.

  “I can see why you’d want to come out here in the mornings,” she said.

  William took a deep breath, and was silent for a moment before he answered. “It’s a good way to start the day. I needed it today after the last week.”

  She nodded as she followed him down a back path that would eventually lead them through a small gatehouse and into the wooded area at the back corner of the castle wall.

  That past several days had been stressful for everyone. The burning of the clinic had been hard on William and Nathaniel in particular; they were both very close to Jacob and Essie, and had always been deeply involved in the now-destroyed Mistle Village clinic.

  Nathaniel had still been distraught and there had been long meetings between him and Stephen, and even with Connie Hardridge. One time, Nathaniel had asked if Quinn would like to join them, but she had refused.

  On her second day back, some of Stephen’s soldiers, following rumors they’d heard, had found the two assailants, hiding in the woods halfway back to the Philothean border. They’d been arrested, but the last she’d heard, they were refusing to talk. Nathaniel had told her he wasn’t surprised by this, Tolliver’s soldiers had likely threatened to harm the men’s families if they were captured and talked.

  Quinn had spent most of the week helping Charlotte, Rebecca, and Linnea with Connie and her children and the funeral preparations. William had been working with Nathaniel, Jacob, and Essie trying to salvage what they could from the burned-out clinic. She hadn’t been able to spend much time with him.. They walked in silence now, enjoying the peaceful moment, the company, and the hot, tangy tea.